What It Means To Win
by I'm a Dumbadosis
Summary: Coda to 3x09. Lauren jumps to conclusions.


The first time Lauren found herself alone with Bo, post-Dawning, the human was attempting to preoccupy her mind by cleaning the apartment. It was a cowardly way to escape her inner turmoil, but Lauren couldn't bear to begin understanding the chaos going on in her life.

She jumped when a light knock sounded through cold apartment.

Bo walked in meekly and paused in the middle of the room, "Hey."

The blonde looked up when her girlfriend entered and smiled briefly in acknowledgment. She glanced back down at the dirty cup in her hand and swallowed thickly. She could feel Bo's hard gaze on her. Her hands wouldn't stop shaking as a result.

"Did you check up on Dyson?" Lauren asked a moment later to break the growing tension.

"Yeah, he's doing great. I left Kenzi in his company before coming here, so…" Bo's voice trailed off. When Lauren still refused to look at her, Bo sighed, "We need to talk."

"Actually," Lauren cut in, dropping the dish in the sink and walking around the island. Still averting eye contact, she headed for work station, "I have a lot of research to continue and lab results to maintain, so I'm afraid I won't have time for anything else." Her voice carried a weary t.

"Lauren, please, look at me."

Lauren sighed once more and dropped her shoulders. Tension still remained in her body as she turned around and faced her girlfriend.

Her girlfriend who just survived a Dawning. Who sucked Lauren's chi for the first time ever to save the life of an ex. Who barely spoke a word to her in the aftermath and left her to tend to Dyson of all people. And that wasn't even half the issues plaguing her mind regarding the succubus.

"What do you want, Bo?" She asked in defeat.

"I want to talk about what happened back there with Dyson, as well as a bunch of other things that I feel has been drifting us apart." Wasting no time, Bo dropped down to the couch and motioned for her to sit down.

Lauren stared at Bo for a minute then let out a shaky breath. "Okay." She sat down gingerly a few feet away from Bo. "Go on."

She saw Bo's eyes flicker across her face, studying her. Then, without preamble, "Dyson got his love back."

It hurt a hundred times more hearing it from Bo, who actually looked happy.

_Of course, she's happy you selfish idiot._

"I-I suspected so." Lauren cleared her throat, eyes burning with unshed tears, "I'm happy for him. He was always a better man with it."

_But what does this mean for us? _was the unspoken question.

There was a pregnant pause. Bo inched closer.

Lauren knew what was coming. It was long overdue. To be honest, she had a timer in the back of her head from the very beginning, counting down the seconds before Bo broke up with her. The doctor was surprised the succubus even stuck around this long.

Wolf boy got his love back, and at the drop of a hat, Bo was running right back to his arms.

_You'll never win._

"Lauren…"

It was the tone in Bo's voice that sounded a lot similar to pity that made her crack, "You choose him. I get it Bo. Why are you dragging this out? Just say it. You love him more than you ever loved me. I saw the way you were looking at him at the Dal. I understand, Bo. So stop treating me like a fragile little girl. I've been through my fair share of heart breaks. I can handle it. So just-"

She was silenced with a kiss.

_Perfect, a pitiful goodbye kiss. _But Lauren didn't move to stop it. She figured she'd make the best of the moment and began reciprocating it.

When they pulled away, Bo was grasping onto Lauren's face, gazing at her adoringly with a soft smile, as though the other woman didn't just break down in front of her.

"I'm gonna marry you one day, Lauren Lewis."

Lauren blinked, "W-what?"

Bo's smile widened, "I'm going to marry you. And we're going to have 2.5 kids and a cute home with a cat and a puppy and every other annoyingly cute cliché." When it was clear Lauren couldn't formulate any coherent thoughts, Bo continued, "It's you. It's always been you. From the very first day we met you made your mark on my heart. Even in the Dawning, my alternate universe consisted of being married to a version of you. You're in me, Lauren. I can't escape you and I don't ever want to. I've never felt this with anyone, not Dyson, not Ryan. _Y__ou_."

Lauren was shaking in tears and soon Bo couldn't help but join in. "Why me?" Lauren shrugged.

"Why not you, baby? You're _everything_. I could name a million reasons why and it still wouldn't cover it." Bo glanced down solemnly, "I know I haven't been the girlfriend you deserve lately," she scooted closer so their foreheads were touching, "and I know I have a lot of making up to do, but honey, I cannot fathom the thought of not being able to hold you like this. Please don't give up on us, on me. I _need_ you."

Lauren surged forward to capture her lips.

Her emotions were running high and she knew not everything was fixed. There was still so much to say, so many obstacles to cross.

But for the time being, she just wanted to relish in the feel of her girl's skin and love. To feel loved in return.

Because for the first time, she _won_.


End file.
